I have a confession to make. I am guilty of the “good day commendations” that are so tempting to fill up our social media feeds with. You know what I mean?
Those posts where we sing the praises of our kids when they do or say something awesome, amazing or incredibly smart. And the ones when our husband’s/mother’s/father’s/sibling’s/best friend’s birthday or other such special event comes around, and we wax poetic and nostalgic, expressing all the ways that we are blessed to have them in our lives.
While there’s nothing wrong with these kinds of posts, and they definitely bring a sense of joy to our hearts, they’ve really had me thinking lately. A friend who posted on his wall about his wife just yesterday confirmed it for me. He said “Theres no occasion for this, but a reminder this morning of the last part of Romans 13:7 to ‘Give honour to whom honour is owed’.” He then proceeded to honour his wife with his words. For no reason except that he loves her and shows her respect through their relationship and because of Christ.
This simple statement stopped me in my tracks. For when I speak all those “good day” commendations for my husband and children, either through social media or in person, I have to wonder: just what is it that I say on an ordinary day?
I know that I am so very guilty of not speaking in love far too often. Of berating my children when they do something wrong, asking the inevitable “What were you thinking?!” when I know already that they weren’t. Sighing in frustration over yet another piano song stumbled through, yet another moment of pestering and provoking, yet another mountain of books, pencils, papers strewn across the floor.
And my husband – when I’m upset with him, what do I think about him? Do I mutter and moan under my breath? Or do I remember that as husband and wife, we are two flawed people in a flawed marriage living in a fallen world…but with a faithful God, (Paul David Tripp, What Did You Expect?) and extend him the grace he not only needs, but deserves.
What do we say on an ordinary day? Let our words be like water, refreshing and bringing life to those around us – whether they’ve done something spectacular to deserve it, or because we sense a need for encouragement, or simply because they are loved.
And parents – build up your children by noticing the little things and speaking positively about them and toward them, even when you’re tempted not to. Champion them.
Let them know you SEE them, love them, are proud of them, and will do nearly anything for them. Let them know, they are loved.